Thursday, 11 October 2018

Instagram-a-go-go

Hello peeps!
Notice that now on the right hand side, there's a shiny new Instagram logo!
You can follow me at @tinglymum. I post many pictures of my bad hair days.

https://www.instagram.com/tinglymum/ 

xx

Wednesday, 10 October 2018

Turning a Corner

This post is long overdue. It's been 9 months since I last wrote something, and a lot has changed.
I had a tendency in the past to only write during the bad times, I guess because it was a good release for me, but as a few people have said to me now, I shouldn't neglect the good times.

This year has bounded by in a flash. I'm feeling the benefits of autumnal weather again (though it must be said that it's unseasonably warm today) and I'm slowing getting myself in shape. Physically and mentally.

Stage One - mental.
After a bad period of depression again, I was referred to the neuropsychology team at the hospital who after a consultation signed me up for group therapy. A course called 'Living with MS' and it's a combination of CBT and ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy). I go every Wednesday for 2 hours,  and the whole course is for 10 weeks. I'm three weeks in and so far it's going great! It's hard work for me (I always leave feeling pretty drained...information overload) but it's really helped to share some of my feelings and experiences, and a marvel to have people actually understand fully what I'm going through. We're all helping each other through the negative thoughts and feelings we've had since our diagnosis, and learning different ways to cope with those feelings. The most valuable thing for me so far, has been meeting other people with MS. There's a real mix of us - some newly diagnosed, some not, some old, some young, male and female. Hopefully we can all use the course to our benefit, and to be honest it just feels nice to finally be getting some help with my mental health. For too long I've relied solely on medication, and like my psychologist says, that can only solve part of the problem. So fingers crossed, by Christmas I should be feeling brighter, and more in control of my depression and anxiety. As well as learning some valuable skills to cope in the bad periods. I will go into more detail on the course in the coming weeks.

Stage Two - physical.
Now, if you've read my blog before, then you know I've struggled with my weight over the years, and have tried various diets (nothing extreme, I have to say) over the years but still the weight has crept up. My downfall is that when I feel ill I comfort eat, and as you can imagine I feel ill a lot! The problem though is that when I'm comfort eating I'm normally not in the frame of mind, or physically able for that matter, to exercise. Hence the weight goes on. The fact is that if I could manage more exercise, then I'd probably feel mentally better and less likely to eat crap. Vicious circle.
Hey ho though. I've tried countless things, but nothing has helped, but I think I've finally cracked it. For now anyway. I've joined Slimming World. Now, yes, I agree that it seems silly to pay someone to tell you to eat healthily and cut out the crap, but for some reason, it really works. The diet is manageable, I'm eating much more fruit and veg which is great, and I don't feel like I'm missing out too many on things. You get so many 'syn' points a week to use on higher fat, sugary things, alcohol, you name it, it's got a syn value, so I can be good throughout the week and know that I can still have a much needed glass of wine, or two, at the weekend. It's doing something because I've lost 5.5 lbs so far in two weeks. It feels so great to finally be losing weight, and I feel better already. More importantly I've found a diet that works without having to do a load of exercise, which is obviously something I struggle with. I'm still managing to walk the dog at the mo, and I'm hoping to do more swimming, so in my mind that's just extra help, but not imperative to losing the weight. 

So quite major, potentially life changing things. For once I feel like I'm taking control of things and it's a great feeling!

Aside from changing personal things, it feels that other things are starting to slot into place too. Ed's started pre-school so I have more free time during the week, and for once I'm not sewing. I think I mentioned the business I had (Bubbaloop) before, where I was sewing and selling (well...trying to sell) baby mobiles and other nursery items. Well, before the summer I admitted to myself that actually it was just putting a heap more pressure on me, and to be honest a sense of failure, which wasn't very nice. Every time I put a lot of time and work into something, then tried to sell it, then not sell it, it just felt like a kick in the teeth. It really didn't do much for my self-esteem, so I just thought 'why am I doing this?!'. I didn't see it as giving up, or me being a failure though. I felt I had turned a corner for finally accepting that I just needed to concentrate on myself and my health and wellbeing.

So it's all positive. It's all good. And I feel like I'm bouncing off the walls a bit writing this. It feels good to write. I should do it more often.



Ahhh....sunshine and happiness. 
(Obviously not me. Though it's kind of making me wish I had long hair again.) 


Tuesday, 1 May 2018

The Challenges of...oh I don't know...god I'm so tired.


I'm not sure what to write about today...just that I should write something! It's been a while, and I promised myself that I would write every week. Minor fail.

I had a day yesterday when I was out from 9.30 until 5 and it's taken its toll. So I'm sat here bleary eyed, with coffee, trying to get some divine inspiration. The fact that I could be out that long is a testament to how well Tysabri is working! In fact I'm due to have my next batch on Thursday, and normally my the end of the month I start flagging so my stamina has been better this month.

I've been sewing a lot again recently, which has meant not writing so much. Last time I was on a sewing 'mission' I was experiencing a manic episode of my bipolar and sewed so much I gave myself RSI in my wrist! This time it is much more relaxed and I'm enjoying it. I'm sewing for my business Bubbaloop which has an Etsy shop. Not much sells at the moment, because the shop isn't that well established, but I'm hoping things will pick up and I can start earning a little bit of money from it. If anything it's keeping me busy, and come September when Ed starts preschool I'm going to have a lot more time on my hands. It's funny how my first thought is 'how can I fill my time', whereas when posting this dilemma to a friend she just said 'look after yourself!'. It's an interesting thought! And one that shouldn't be overlooked!

It's like there's a light at the end of the tunnel now, and I see how things are going to become less physically demanding which frankly is a bit of a relief. No one can prepare you for how hard it's going to be, yes it's a happy and rewarding time, but hard nonetheless. As a mum with MS, that was always my fear - that I wouldn't be able to cope with the physical demands, but I'm nearly at the point where I feel like I can say 'I've done that and bought the T-shirt'.

In the grand scheme of looking after myself, I'm still on a mission to lose weight....but not only that just get healthy. Try and do more exercise and enjoy it. In the past I've used MS as a reason to not do certain types of exercise, like aerobics for example, because the high impact stuff doesn't mix well with fatigue, but I've found some YouTube videos that are doable for me. This one is a 'Walk at Home' which I found really good. It's only 25 minutes, which is fine for me, and it intermingles walking and standing toning exercises.

I've also cut out sugar again, but I'm determined to have a real lifestyle change and stick at it this time - I haven't had any sugar in 3 weeks. I am very proud of that, and weirdly I don't miss it. I'm waiting for some huge sledgehammer of craving to hit me, but it hasn't yet which is good and so far I've noticed that cutting out sugar has helped with my tingles which is great.

I think I've brain dumped enough for now! I promise my next post will be full of purpose and be wonderfully witty. ;)

Till next time
x


sea mobile, baby mobile, needle-felted mobile, fish mobile, octopus, underwater mobile

My favourite mobile that I've done for the shop!