I'll start from the beginning. When I was growing up, all I ever wanted to do was be in film or television. However, though I was lucky to have different talents (like art, photography and acting), it meant I never set my mind to one thing. One minute I wanted to be an actress, the next a set designer, then a camerawoman, then a make-up artist, then....well you get the idea. I got so muddled that I never made up my mind, but I just knew I wanted to do something (to be honest, I could have been making tea or cleaning the bogs on a film set and I would have been happy).
So, skipping forward a few years, I turn 18. And WHAM I get diagnosed. At the worst time, when I was in my final year of A Levels and finally needed to decide what I wanted to do. Being young, and knocked for six and scared and worried and depressed, I threw the whole idea of TV and film out of the window. That was it. I just gave up and resided myself to the fact that it was never going to happen because I was ill. I'm a practical person, and just didn't feel comfortable with the thought of how much pressure I would have to put myself under to do something in that industry, and the unpredictability of it scared the life out of me.
So life was lived, and despite not doing my dream job, I've been happy. I mean, how many people really get their dream job anyway?! :-P
But....9 months ago, I started to think about things again. All of a sudden I had this new found confidence brought about my motherhood. Being a Mum taught me that I was much stronger and capable than I first thought, so I declared 'Bu**er it! Let's give it a shot!'.
I decided to focus on voice work because you can do that at home, and to try and get into becoming a background artist. Both of these choices were the realistic options because they are more flexible, and extra work would be a great way to be on set and learn things, in a less demanding manner. I mean, even after my first day of filming (if I'm that lucky!), if I sit back and think 'nah...that was too much' at least I know that I tried and did something. As I get older, I've definitely realised that this niggling feeling isn't going to go away until I give it a shot, and why not now?
So there we go. :)
I've signed up for one database already, I'm going to sign up with a proper casting agency this weekend, and I've already applied for my first job. So fingers crossed. I very much doubt I'll find anything any time soon, but here's hoping! One little problem, is that I can see myself getting over-excited and a bit obsessed with the whole thing, so I keep reminding myself that I'm a Mum first and the work was intended to be low-key and as relaxed as it can be. I can't get too worked up and start applying for every little thing that comes along. I just need to chill out and see what happens.
You know what though, I have a specific ambition. As a big Doctor Who fan my absolute dream is to be an extra on that show, and last night I found out that William Hartnell, the first Doctor, had MS. He left because of it, but to me..that's a sign. HERE YE HERE YE...I announce that one day I will be on Doctor Who!! Even if it's just for a day......and I'm cleaning the toilets! :D
The obligatory 'headshot' taken by my Mum, no less!
If you end up cleaning the Dalek toilets, I want to know what Dalek poop looks like. Best wishes & fingers crossed that you get some jobs come through soon!
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